Put back on your wig

Now from the title, you may be confused. But yes we will be having a talk about wigs today. The easy to make, versatile, convenient bundles of joy. So now we got that out of the way, let’s talk.

Growing up, hair has always been a topic of conversation. Whether it be at home, at school, or even in documentaries – it was and still is, everywhere. I can vividly remember the compliments, the snide remarks and even looks given to me regarding my hair. And as sad or happy as they had made me feel at the time, they had never made me feel angry. Until now.

Due to the convenience of wigs, they’re usually my go to when getting ready for work. However, there was one day I decided to just wear my hair out. I won’t lie and say I wasn’t at all concerned about what people may think, because I was but at no point did I think anyone would make comments, but I was definitely proven wrong. During my break, I was met by ignorance, from a “black brother” who proceeded to laugh and question the whereabouts of my wig once he saw me. Confused, I asked what do you mean, to which he replied “your wig, you need to put it back on.”

My naivety to the idea that someone of the same complexion of me, could not ridicule something that also grows out of their own scalp, had me stunned that day. Now don’t get me wrong, yes the comment was probably made in jest but that also highlights another fundamental point – to think before you speak, as words can affect people. Comments like that and those similar, cause people to hate the things that are unique to them, things they have no input into how they’re moulded and shaped, things which are natural.

At first the assumption to this situation could be that this was subconscious everyday texture discrimination as no other natural, apart from me, miss 4B/C was singled out, whilst the girls with the looser texture were not. However, having received similar comments with relaxed hair, to me it just confirms an already popular narrative.

Natural hair is only acceptable to some, when it is of a certain look. As uncomfortable as it is to admit, it’s the truth. And until people begin to believe that this is not okay, then that’s is when they will start to make the steps to change and rectify their thinking from the inside, out.

Another crucial point that needs to be mentioned is that, if a woman wears weave, it doesn’t mean she doesn’t love herself any less nor does it make her more attractive than if she was to wear her own natural hair. If a woman relaxes her hair, it doesn’t mean she hates her hair texture. If a woman wears her hair in braids, it doesn’t make her any more “woke” or desirable than her frontal wearing neighbour. A woman’s hair is hers to do whatever it is she wants to do with it.

And finally, to my beautiful women, there are people out there who will love you and your hair, however you want to wear it. Please, with all your power make sure those are the people you keep in your life. The people that will continuously appreciate you and what you have to offer.  The people who embrace and encourage you to just to be you. Those are the ones who matter.